Player Profiles
Here are some of the players from our club. Some still play, some think they can still play and some just don't know when to quit! Thanks to Alex Breading for supplying these profiles.
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 Martin Ewins |
AKA: 'Stormin / Mearsy / Chabal' Pos: No.8 Age: 24 Height: 6'2" Weight: 17st Heroes: Ray Mears & Sebastian Chabal Motto: "Not tonight ladies, I've rugby in the morning " Hobbies: Getting injured; walking the thin blue line; hunting Profile added: 2004/5 |
The Sebastian Chabal of the team, Ewins is an immense No.8. Strong & Powerful, deceptively quick and excellent with ball in hand. Just as Samson's hair was responsible for his legendary strength, Ewins has recently found that his 'love tackle' is responsible for his. By depriving the ladies of his adopted home of Richmond on a Friday night , 'Mearsy' can concentrate his efforts fully on a Saturday. So to summarise if he gets a shag the night before, hes' shagged throughout the game! |
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 Brett Furbach |
AKA: 'Fergie ' |
Without a doubt 'Ferg' has one of the biggest personalities, known to man. A ruthless guy on the pitch, who excels in the rucking game (partly due to his New Zealand heritage), and takes no prisoners. A great player to play with, horrible to play against, but far worse to referee! Ferg spent more time in the sin bin than anyone else last season! (14 times all in all). A record that only he could beat. |
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 Dave Gillespie |
AKA: 'Little Hands/ Gilleebo' Pos: 2nd Row/ Back Row DOB: 1979 Height: 5'11" Weight: 15St 7lbs Hero: David Brent Motto: "Write the theme tune, Sing the theme tune!" Hobbies: Climbing the corporate ladder. Studying the Art of 'Delegation Profile added: 2006/7 |
David (or Daffyd), has ended his second season as First XV captain, and leads by example. His organisation and no nonsense approach, was one of the main reasons for Canvey's unbelievable couple of seasons. He plays with incredible desire and controlled aggression (sometimes!). However Dave is probably best known for his massive thighs and tiny hands, an odd but successful combination that is never the centre of ridicule. |
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 Tony Gould |
AKA: "Dumpy" |
As far as Scrum Halfs go, there aren't many better in Essex than Tony Gould. An excellent passer, tough tackler and explosive runner, he can do it all. A very competitive player, who doesn't lack aggression, and can give it as well as take it. As a senior member of the squad , 'Dumpy' uses all of his experience, to avoid unnecessary confrontations, thus keeping him from the sin bin!..............sometimes. |
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 Kevin Hobart |
AKA: "Odd Job" |
One of the best Props the club has had, Kev was a major part in the 1 st XV Double Success. His strong scrummaging and vast experience means he makes a big difference to any side. Away from the Gladatorial Arena that is the front row, Kev can be found sweating it out in the 'Mosh Pit' section of an 'Itchy Bullet Band' concert. |
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 Danny Horton |
AKA: "Silverfox'', "The General" Pos: Hooker Age: 96 Height: 5' 8" Weight: short wheel based transit Hero: Hannibal Smith, Winston Churchill Motto: " We will fight them on Canvey beaches, we will fight them on Tewkes Creek, we will never surrender!" Hobbies: Leading, Orchestrating, Commanding, Spreading his wisdom to the Computer illiterate Profile added: 2004/5 |
Dan. E . Horton is 'The Daddy' of the Stacks. No one plays with more passion or desire in the club. The seasoned War Veteran will always be found on the wrong side of a maul, putting hands in the ruck and generally just ruining the oppositions game. Willing to put his head in where it hurts, he wears his heart on his sleeve and bleeds blue and red. His tactical genius is only overshadowed by his unique style of lineout throwing. A great captain who gives protection to the younger players allowing them to express themselves, whilst dealing with any liberty takers fairly and within the rules of the game....honest! |
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 Simon King |
AKA: "Kingy / Sponge Bob'' |
'Kingy' had an excellent season, making a big impact whenever he played. A good scrummager who loves a physical challenge, Simon is immensely strong! On the pitch he is capable of some big hits on his opponents. Off the pitch 'Kingy' is just as intense as he is on it. He pushes himself hard daily, watching hour upon hour of television, until transmission ceases. A truly dedicated man! |
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 James Saunders |
AKA: 'B.A' |
The Big man took over the reigns last year, and helped turn the club around. In one year the club went from the disappointment of relegation, to having its most successful season ever. Armed with a fresh approach and new gameplan he helped renew optimisum and self belief. Playing mainly as an impact player, the big man is almost impossible to stop, very strong, with good hands. Known for his diplomatic approach and patience, it is unusual for B.A to disagree with anyone! |
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 Gareth Slow |
AKA: " Slowy'' |
Gareth is a solid player who always gives it everything in both training and games. Normally found on the wing, 'Slowie' found his bodies metabolism, & increased workloads was telling him it was about time he looked to play as a forward. After a few games in the back row, he realised it was the contact game he enjoys the most. He is now training hard again and quickly regaining his fitness again. Shame really 'cos for a good few months he possessed the greatest set of man boobs ever! |
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 Brett Smith |
AKA: 'Smithers' |
Brett had a great season last year, after finally finding his ideal position. A passionate player who lives and breathes Canvey RUFC. His aggressive style of running and excellent kicking record, saw Brett become top points scorer last season. Brett is best loved by all the players by the way he makes them feel special, either by blasting their eardrums away on the training pitch, or by gently urinating on them in the shower. For Season 2006/7 Brett will be sponsored by: |
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 Luke Smith |
AKA: " Beaumont''/ "Chav" |
After spending a successful year in the 2 nd XV, Luke was soon promoted, bringing his all action style to the 1 st XV. A Quality tackler in defence, and an opportunist attacker, he manages to get through the slightest of gaps in any defence. Luke always trains hard and gives everything whenever he plays. One of the best parts of 'Beaumont's' game, is the way he will invite one of the opposition to hit him, and then stand there in astonishment 'cos he got whacked! |
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 Darren Smith |
AKA: 'Del Boy' |
Del is the exception that proves the rule. The smallest player in the side, playing in without a doubt one of the toughest positions. A skilful player with ball in hand, an accurate thrower and a big heart that wont let him back out of any challenge! But along with a big heart, comes a big ol' head with his pride of joy 'His Mullet'. His footwork off the pitch is just as impressive, his patented 'revving leg' dance is legendary across the club...mate! Don't let him get too drunk tho, chances are he will ask to marry you.again, and again, and again, and again..!!!!! |
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 Alfie Webster |
AKA: 'A.L.F.', 'Alfie Moon' Pos: Centre / Winger Age: 21 Height: 5'10" Weight: 12St 7lbs Hero: Lance Armstrong Motto: "2 wheels are better than 4!" Hobbies: Cycling, cycling, cycling Profile added: 2004/5 |
Alfie Webster is a true gentleman who helps elderly woman (my mum) round his supermarket with her shopping. When he is not doing that, he can be found terrorising defences around Essex . One of the quickest players in the club, Alfie exploded onto the Canvey scene with a beautiful dump tackle on Mr. Brumwell during a pre season training session. His devotion to rugby has seen the 'whippet' shed 2 stone, and he continues to push for a 1 st XV place. |
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